“That Dental Appointment Was a Darn Good Time” (Alternate Title: “2020 Sucks”)

I was so excited to go to the dentist last week.  

Now that’s a sentence I never thought I’d write.  But there I was, with freshly washed hair and pants that buttoned, about to be seen in public by humans who aren’t related to me. And I was ready. 

When my dentist asked me if anything new or exciting was going on, I replied that this was my excitement.  Sitting in that dental chair, wearing my daughter’s polka-dot mask, was the highlight of my day (I forgot my own face covering, so I was forced to raid the emergency stash I keep in my purse.  Because, in 2020, we keep extra face masks in our purses.  Or…some people do.  I guess I don’t replenish my stash after each mask “emergency,” so I was left to stretch my 8-year-old’s mask across my decidedly non-child-sized face so that I would be allowed to enter the dentist’s office.).

I’ll tell you what, though, that dental appointment was a darn good time. I bet my dentist shares better 2020 memes than yours does.  And, really, isn’t that the yardstick we use to measure a person’s worth during this madness? (If you are nodding your head, you should probably go follow Andy Beiser.)

By the way, did you realize we have nearly reached the seven-month mark in this madness? Seven months during which I have been relatively quiet. I have kept quiet for several reasons. 

Of course, I have been busy, because jobs, kids, quarantine, ugh. I’ve also been slowly working on another writing project in any stolen moments.  

Another reason I have kept my mouth shut is that, no matter what you say these days, you are inevitably going to piss off roughly half of the people you know. The division feels insurmountable. And it’s not that I’m afraid to make people mad.  I make people mad all. the. time. Just ask my kids. But I haven’t felt like I had anything helpful to share with the angry masses.

I’ve also had a hard time finding my natural (okay, maybe not so natural…) optimism.  It felt strange to look for things to be happy about in the face of 2020. It seemed wrong to seek joy amidst so much global suffering and uncertainty.  And that’s what this blog has been about – finding gratitude in the chaos of everyday life.  So, if I can’t find gratitude, where does that leave me?

But I missed my little blog. So I decided to become a rational optimist.  Does 2020 suck?  Why, yes, yes it does.  AND YET, I am still grateful for a crackling fire in the fireplace. I am thankful for winter hats and books and hugs from my kids. I will recognize the general level of worldwide suckiness and still hold hope for better, and I will find gratitude for small pieces of beauty.  That is not to ignore the state of the world, but just to know that this, too, shall pass.

Because it will. 

I recently ran across a post, deep down some Facebook rabbit hole, about how folks born in the early 1900s witnessed World War I, the Spanish Flu, the Great Depression, the holocaust and World War II. They also weathered the Korean War and the Vietnam War.  All in their one lifetime. And that isn’t even an exhaustive list.

That’s a lot of tragedy, people. But the point of the post was that those events are now in our history books. That means, as awful and unimaginable as they were, they ended. Which is true, although it doesn’t erase those events.

The post stuck with me, so when my dad later pointed out that my granddad had been 11 (my son’s current age) during the Spanish Flu, I really got to thinking. My granddad endured many things in his life.  Undoubtedly, my son will face new hardships I can’t even fathom. That, my friends, is terrifying. 

But what that Facebook post left out is that those same folks born at the beginning of the 1900s also witnessed the roaring 20s, the first transcontinental flight, the Golden Age of Hollywood, the first moon landing, the fall of the Berlin Wall, and the first organ transplants. The first Mickey Mouse cartoon and the first Oreo! They found love, maybe witnessed the births of their own children, experienced personal victories and overcame individual obstacles untold. 

Bottom line: Life has always been miserable.  

Also: Life has always been beautiful.  

That isn’t going to change now.  Our current circumstances are going to change; the overall nature of the world will not. The good doesn’t erase the bad, but it has always co-existed with it.  And it always will. 

I do hope going to the dentist isn’t always the high point of my week, though. No offense, Dr. Ryan.