Merry Christmas

I just took a look back at my first blog post of 2020.  That was a trip. I wanted to do all the things this year.  I was so cute, with my big goals and ridiculous aspirations. I thought I had a plan.  You probably thought you did, too.  I even wanted to run a freaking marathon.  (Spoiler alert:  I did not run a marathon. I didn’t even wear hard pants after March 15.) 

Maybe you had more appropriate goals, goals that were more in line with reality.  Maybe you wanted to learn to bake bread or catch up on your Netflix. In that case, I bet you were a real goal-getter in this year of our Lord 2020. 

I also didn’t send Christmas cards this year, so consider this your holiday greeting. An endless cycle of quarantines prevented us from having family photos taken (and also prevented me from getting to the salon to address the, um, less colorful strands on my head, so no way was I stepping in front of a camera).  I realize I could’ve, and absolutely should’ve, used any old photo for the dang cards, but I was being unreasonably crabby.  Everyone is allowed to be crabby sometimes. Except my kids.  Actually, it’s just me.  I am allowed to be crabby sometimes. 

But I am truly proud of my kids. They did do all the things this year.  They were guinea pigs for virtual learning, and then for socially distanced learning.  (And then for virtual learning again. And then for socially distanced learning again.  You get the idea.) One also managed to earn his black belt in karate this year, while the other mastered her back handspring and moved on to back tucks.  And they did it with masks on. Folks say kids are resilient, and folks are right. My kids – and all of our kids – are truly amazing. 

I’m also proud of myself this year, even though I didn’t cross many items off my to-do list. I am proud of the simple fact that I didn’t go off the deep end. I’m not gonna lie. I dipped my big toe in that water. But I reined myself in via the last season of Schitt’s Creek and every season of Somebody Feed Phil, both of which I highly recommend to you and your mental health. 

And I’m proud of you. Whether you discovered you were essential (a HUGE thank you goes out to you!), or you stayed home and tried to teach your kids math (and a huge glass of wine goes out to you), you are still standing here at the end of 2020, surveying the ashes of our former reality.  You are the picture of perseverance. We all faced our own challenges this year, and we are all stronger than we were 9 months ago. 

I don’t know what your Christmas will look like this year, but I bet it will be a little different than last year.  And I won’t pretend to know what 2021 has in store for us (I really thought I was going to run a marathon this year, so my predictive abilities are not to be trusted). 

So this year, especially, I hope you embrace the holiday that is in front of you now. I hope you remember that Christmas is more than a holiday party or a visit with Santa.  I hope you can keep your sense of humor and ditch your expectations. I hope you make room for small moments of joy, even in the middle of grief or uncertainty.  I hope you give what you can and ask for what you need. I hope you find a way to connect with loved ones.  And, most of all, I hope you forgive yourself if you didn’t send Christmas cards or run a marathon or wear real pants this year (And if you did manage to do those things, well…good for you.). 

Merry Christmas, and I’m proud of us all!